Friday, December 14, 2012

Poem - There is no time

I thought for this blog post, I would simply publish a poem of mine.  Enjoy!



There is no time


slipping
and wheeling down steep slopes
the wind catches our ease
and sends us to outer reaches
where the dead sleep their ancient sleep
      and lullabies are heard no more

there is no time
to wind back the happiness we had
there is no time
to whisper secrets to tall fences
      it will take forever
           to answer
for all the wishes the day has given to evening stillness

a thought I once had
was to catch all the dust
from all the mantelpieces
that contain the bric-a-brac
     of lives still lived
         and put it into a bottle
seal it tight as air in summer
and give it to the ground
so that when time was right
and stars were aligned in shapes made of silk
the wantings of farthest wanderings
       would remember
           what the forest never could
(and that is the future
and all that has been given with good intent)

I will always be here
before any other move made
on any chessboard
I will always be here
and when the rest are gone
to scrape fire from their eyes
      I will give you water
           and you will douse the flames
of what should never be
and what will always be
in times of side glimpsed hope
and burnt down vision
and in this
the whole world will reel
it will nestle on window panes
and give back to spirited adventurers
a key
that none have yet used
    and it will open doors
          that sand never could
and in these places
rooms made of evil acts
will scare even the bravest
and their tongues will speak of war
but their hearts will yearn for peace

and then
before too long
I will have the sound you make
as you drift to sleep
     and we will cradle the dark
             and give rest to the wicked

Friday, November 30, 2012

Poem in Snorkel

A few weeks ago I had the great pleasure of being published in an online poetry journal called Snorkel.  Snorkel is a great journal, publishing Australian and New Zealand poetry and from around the world.  My poem is one of my oneiric poems, meaning dream-like.  The poem resonates with Holderlin's poetry, and has a line structure that is similar to Holderlin's.  The poem aims to find that fragmented and disjointed beauty we find in dreams.  You can read the poem here in the Snorkel journal. Hope you enjoy!

Friday, November 23, 2012

Award for Brainwaves

Last Saturday night our radio show Brain Waves won an award at the Community Broadcasting Association of Australia awards dinner. The award was for excellence in training.  When we were trained, we all did demos, and 3CR sent them in. The award is very large, and a national award, and everyone at Brain Waves is over the moon.  I got to go up on stage with my colleagues and the collect the award. I was wearing my top hat of course! Ben Rinaudo, our program co-ordinator, gave a great speech. Hopefully this award helps to lay another plank on the bridge towards the de-stigmatisation of mental illness in the community. Thanks to the Mental Illness Fellowship of Victoria who sponsor the show.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Feature at the Dan O'Connell

On Saturday I had the great pleasure of being the feature poet at the Dan O'Connell poetry sessions.  I had an half an hour slot, and so got to show case a good portion of my oeuvre.  I read from from published poems, my new poems, and some old favourites.  I also read from my two books, which was a real treat.  I sold some of my books, and signed a few copies.  There were about 20 people there, and I got quite an ovation at the end of my time. I even got to where my top hat! The Dan O'Connell is a real institution, and it was an honour to be able to contribute to this great history.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Griffith University Conference

Had the great pleasure last week to be invited to the anual Griffith University postgraduate conference, called Borders Boundaries and Transgressions. It was at the Gold Coast campus.  The day was filled with great postgraduate papers, on a whole range of topics, from acquired brain injury, to artist rights, to social media and gothic fiction. My part of the day came at the end when I was asked to speak to the postgraduates about careers post the PhD.  I spoke about my life as a writer, the media I had done, my experiences volunteering for mental health NGO's and gave some advice about the PhD experience itself.  A great day was had by all, and looking forward to next year!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Poets Corner

Thought I would do a blog on my radio show.  I host a radio show once a month on 3CR.  It is part of the Brain Waves Program, and is called Poets Corner.  Brainwaves is a show about and for people with mental illness.  We hear stories of recovery, stories of struggle, funny stories, and sad stories.  The show  is sponsored by the Mental Illness Fellowship of Victoria.  Poets Corner is the poetry branch of the show.  We interview people with mental illness who are poets, about their life and work.  We hear their poems, and hear about their struggles.  We have interviewed Stu Hatton, Initially No, Maree Cowan amongst others.  My co-host is the poet and artist Graeme Doyle.  We really have a great re pore   We met during our training sessions, and got along famously. In fact, these training sessions, which were recorded as demos, have been nominated for the training award at the awards night for the Australian Association of Community Radio.  Let's see if we win!

If you would like to listen to podcasts of Poets Corner you can click here to go to the 3CR website, or you can find them on itunes!

Friday, October 19, 2012

Ceremony for Mental Health Week

On Sunday I had the great pleasure of being involved in a ceremony to mark the end of mental health week.  The ceremony was run by the Mental Illness Fellowship of Victoria, and I read a poem.  I got some great feedback about my performance, and I got to wear my top hat!  The poem was on relationships, and it was one of my better poems I think.  We had a civil celebrant conduct the ceremony, and Heidi Everett played music throughout the performance.  The Mental Illness Fellowship of Victoria do some fine work, and there contribution to awareness of mental health issues is extraordinary   I had the great pleasure to work on their helpline for a year, which was a great experience.

Here is to breaking down the stigma of mental illness!

Friday, September 28, 2012

Feature at West Word

On Sunday I had the good fortune of being the feature poet at West Word poetry in Footscray at the Dancing Dog Cafe.  The event had a real intimate feel. I read from my Diary of a Schizophrenic, and from a Schizophrenic on Artaud. It was also the first time I had the opportunity to read an extended set of my poetry to an audience.  This felt really great. I was able to for the first time see many of the tropes and obsessions I have in my poetry.  I could see that I love words like 'silence', 'dreams', 'places', 'clouds', 'rain' and a whole host of other notions and concepts that concern me deeply.  I could see how my form of oneiric poetry really has a strength of its own.  I love to capture the dream-like in my poetry, and bend associations, and fragment things, just like in a dream.

My next feature spot will be at the Dan O'Connell hotel on the 10th of November at 2pm. Hope to see you there!

Friday, September 14, 2012

Diary of a Schizophrenic on Youtube

We have recently posted a new video of me reading from my first book, Diary of a Schizophrenic, on Youtube.  The diary was kept during my first psychotic episode in 1998.  It has a real literary feel, and talks about writers such as William Blake, T.S. Eliot, Ludwig Wittgenstein and Homer.  The section I read from is later in the book when I have recovered from my episode, and discusses T.S. Eliot's work 'Tradition and the Individual Talent'.

You can watch the video here on Youtube!

Hope you enjoy!

Friday, September 7, 2012

Poem

Though I would simply post a poem for this blog. Its called 'Silence will have its way'.  Enjoy!



Silence will have its way



     [singing in the trees before first light]
                         
I know
                    that what this ritual
will give     to the remains of the day
          can still the hunter in his tracks

             what is now the silence     between heartbeats
was once the dew on  the ground during a twilight interlude
                         of dancing Naiads and their dreaming

life lived in the moment     between rings of a tower bell
   can placate the wind during its solemn journey
                   (it now picks up pieces of broken glass
and scatters them to where the light of tomorrow will not go)

                     what is left of this adventure
                               is written
        in the hearing     of an ancient rainbow’s restful sleep
                   as it lets the sea breathe a new breath

                          (I truly believe I have felt
              in the lashing of a wave on the rocks
                                the rain of all there is)

and when the stars have given up their claim on the dawn’s memories
                 the hope       that cradles our longing
                             will gather itself
                 as it has never done before

                             and what the clouds will never know
            is that the footsteps of yesterday’s travels
                   will only be enough
      to string       the bow of the last violin
that has ever grasped the air of our furthest wandering

                       [before then
                  silence will have its way]

Friday, August 31, 2012

Collected Online Works

Thought I would go through and list my collected online works for your enjoyment.

I will start with my books.  Diary of a Schizophrenic was my first book, and was launched at the 2010 Melbourne Writers Festival.  It was a diary I kept in 1998 during my first psychotic episode.  You can buy the book here on Amazon.

My second book, A Schizophrenic on Artaud, was launched at Readings in Carlton.  It is a poetic exploration of the life and work of the French author Antonin Artaud.  You can buy the work here on Amazon.

Next to my poems.  I have had quite a few poems published in online journals.  The first, a few poems I had published in Mascara Literary Review.  Then Stylus, Divan, and verb-ate-him. My poem in Westerly will be out online in the next year or so, but you can view the details here.

I was at the Emerging Writers Festival this year, and the ABC were filming.  You can view the panel I was on here at the Big Ideas website. I was also on channel 31 reading from my second book on a show called Red Lobster.  You can watch here.

After the launch of my first book at the Melbourne Writers Festival, I was on Radio National's program All in the Mind.  You can listen here.

I also host a radio show on 3CR called Poet's Corner, as part of the Brainwaves show.  You can download podcasts here.

I had an article published in an online academic journal in the UK called Consciousness Literature and the Arts on the ballet dancer Nijinsky. You can read the article here.  I also had a paper on Foucault published in an academic journal called Cogito.  You can view the details here.

I gave a paper on Wittgenstein and Schizophrenia at the University of Sydney.  You can view the abstract here.

There is footage of me reading from my Artaud book on youtube which you can watch here.

The details of my Masters degree and PhD can be found on Trove here.

Hope this is to your enjoyment! Stay tuned for more publications!

Friday, August 24, 2012

Poem in Divan Poetry Journal

I have had the good fortune to have a poem out in the new Divan Poetry Journal.  It's called 'Where Memories Form'. It's a poem I like to think of as being one of my oneiric poems (meaning dream-like). You can read the poem here. Hope you enjoy!

Friday, August 3, 2012

A Schizophrenic on Artaud on Youtube

I have posted a video on youtube of me reading from my new book, A Schizophrenic on Artaud.  I thought the surrounds of my study worked quite well, with some antiquarian books sitting on my mahogany writing desk (with a globe of the world on the corner).  I read from the last part of the book, which has a very dramatic last line - "Silence". Thanks to my brother who produced the video, he did a great job.  You can see the video here on youtube. Hope you enjoy!

Friday, July 27, 2012

ABC TV

I had the great pleasure of being on ABC TV two weeks ago.  The ABC were filming at the Emerging Writers Festival, where I was on a panel called Tough Topics.  I spoke about my academic work, my life with schizophrenia, my books, and some of the work I am doing on the Brainwaves radio show on 3CR. Highlights of me were broadcast on ABC News 24.  I had a great evening at home with a friend watching the telecast. I asked the question, 'Why is schizophrenia still a tough topic?', and generated some discussion. You can watch the full panel on the Big Ideas website here. Hope you enjoy!

Friday, July 20, 2012

John Milton and the Imagination

John Milton, living in England during the 17th century, is regarded by many as the greatest of English poets.  His monumental work, Paradise Lost, has a remarkable history. Detailing the story of the fall of Adam and Eve from paradise, and the plots of Satan, the work has a remarkable poetic resonance.  What is most interesting about the work, is that it was written when Milton was blind.  Much like Beethoven, who went deaf, it is interesting to muse upon the abilities of those who lose their principle sense, and still manage to create.  I would argue that in losing this sensibility, the imaginative powers are heightened.  Just as when one sense diminishes in an individual, the other senses increase - so to it seems the imaginative faculties of the afflicted can rise dramatically.  This can happen with more striking affect for those who create through that particular sense.  This argument can also be ascribed to Jorge Louis Borges, who also went blind.  Milton dictated his work to his daughters, who acted as a conduit for the then blind Milton, and helped create a work that is considered one of the greats of world literature.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

August Strindberg and Schizophrenia

Strindberg is fascinating for those wishing to understand creative intersections with schizophrenia.  Strindberg rose to prominence with plays such as Miss Julie and The Father.  His plays were performed around the world, in particular in Paris and Berlin (and towards the end of his life in America).  In his forties he experienced a psychotic episode, and detailed his illness in a book called Inferno, which he wrote from diaries entries he kept during the time.  The book is full of psychotic traces.  He believed that someone was trying to kill him using electrical currents from a machine in the room above his. He believed that lighting strikes in his area were specifically designed for him (a delusion known as a delusion of self-reference).  The world was full of heightened and special significance for him, and he felt directed by these meanings.  He believed that special 'Powers' were directing his life.  In one instance, on the eve of departure for an overseas trip, he said he couldn't go, because the Powers forbade it.

How could one of such outstanding creative talent believe in such things?  Because schizophrenia can bring with it great creative outpourings which Strindberg was able to harness to create his oeuvre.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Emerging Writers Festival

I had the great pleasure to be on two panels at the Emerging Writers Festival last week.  The first was a panel called 'Tough Topics'. Schizophrenia was my tough topic, and I spoke about my two books, my life with schizophrenia, and some of the volunteering I am doing for the Mental Illness Fellowship of Victoria.  I was joined by Romy Ash, Sydney Smith and Fregmonto Stokes.  The panel was chaired by Ruby J Murray.  We had a great discussion about how to best write about tough topics.  At one point, when asked what I wouldn't write about, I said "Britney Spears".  Many laughs from the audience. The panel was being filmed by ABC1 for their show 'Big Ideas'.  We'll see if we get on!

The second panel I was on was called Letters to the Editor, and was more of a free form Q & A with the audience.  We broached many topics, including digital media, publishing people from disadvantaged backgrounds, and Australian Literature. I spoke about the desire to write as being and important motivator, and the financial difficulties of being a writer.

Over all it was a great weekend, and I met many great people.  Even signed a few books!

Friday, April 27, 2012

A Schizophrenic on Artaud, Television and Radio

My new book, A Schizophrenic on Artaud is doing quite  well.  I have had a television appearance reading from the book on a show called Red Lobster on channel 31.  I read from the start of the book, just to give the audience a feel for the tenor of the work.  You can watch it here at the Red Lobster website.

I have also been on radio promoting the book on a show called Brainwaves on 3CR.  I was interviewed with poet Stu Hatton on the 11th of April, and did some co-hosting of the show on the 18th of April.  You can listen to these shows here.

Thanks for all the support from these shows.  You can buy the book on Amazon here.  Hope you enjoy it!

Friday, March 30, 2012

Launch of A Schizophrenic on Artaud at Readings

I am pleased to announce that my new book, 'A Schizophrenic on Artaud' will be launched at Readings in Carlton. Come along for free wine. The book will be launched by Dr Martin Plowman, and I will be giving a speech as well. Here are the details:

Location: Readings bookstore, 309 Lygon street Carlton.
Date: Monday the 16th of April
Time: 6:30pm.

Here is the link to the Readings website for further details of the launch:

http://www.readings.com.au/event/paul-fearne-book-launch-of-a-schizophrenic-on-artaud

Thank you, and see you there!

Friday, February 3, 2012

A Schizophrenic on Artaud (Paperback)

I am pleased to announce that the paperback of my new book A Schizophrenic on Artaud has now been released. Artaud, writing in the early to mid parts of the 20th century in France, had great impact on the cultural meileu of the time. He suffered from schizophrenia which was to make his life fraught with difficulties. He was in about 20 silent films, but truly made his mark through his writing. His work The Theatre and its Double was to gain him a substantial readership.

My work is a poetic reflection in Artaud's life and work. I used my own insight into my schizophrenia to shape the book. It reads in poetic prose, and also explores the literature of the French epoch of that time, as well as other points in history and other literatures of other countries.

The book is published by Chipmunkapublishing, and is available through Amazon.

You can buy a copy here at the Amazon site.

Hope you enjoy it!